


Seven Hours

by TheNorthRemembers



Category: League of Legends RPF
Genre: Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Skyping, Talking, some emotional stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-08
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-19 04:04:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5952976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNorthRemembers/pseuds/TheNorthRemembers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rekkles feels a little overwhelmed with all the responisbilty as the captain of the new fnatic and Deft comforts him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Seven Hours

It’s 2 am in the morning and Martin “Rekkles“ Larsson can’t sleep. He’s been lying awake for an hour now, just staring at the white ceiling in the dark. He can hear the rain against the window and normally Martin likes the sound, it’s calming, just white noise filling the silence. But tonight it’s none of those things. It’s just there, a consistent buzzing keeping the thoughts racing around in his head from settling down, making him groan and bury his head under his pillow but it’s not helping. Nothing is.

 

There is just so much going on in his mind, the last night he didn’t have trouble falling asleep must have been weeks ago.

 

Things are different now, everything is. Reignover and Huni are gone. And so is Yellowstar. It shouldn’t hurt as much as it does because rationally Martin gets it, he gets why his former teammates chose to do what they did. He gets it, he really does and yet he can’t help but feel this bitter taste of betrayal every time he thinks about it.

 

It’s childish and he hates it. He’s a professional for god’s sake. But it hurts. And he can’t talk to anyone about it. Fabian seems to be doing just fine. He and Dayoon just instantly clicked; they are laughing and goofing around like they’ve known each other forever.

 

For Martin it’s different. He gets along with the new members just fine, he IS a professional after all, but it’s not friendship, not yet. They are colleagues to him. He tries his best to be open to get along and it works, it works to a certain point. But at moments like this, in the dead of night with nothing but his thoughts and the drumming rain to keep him company Martin just feels a little bit hollow. And lonely.

 

He glances at the glowing red numbers of his alarm clock.

 

2.19 am.

 

About 6 hours till sunrise.

 

Martin breathes in, holds it, breathes out. Once more. Twice more. 7 hours.

 

9 am. It’s 9 am in Shanghai right now. And the sun has already risen there. Martin wonders if it’s raining there too. Probably not. It’s half a world away. _He_ is half a world away.

 

Martin switches on his bedside lamp and grabs his laptop quickly. He hesitates for a second though. Hyukkyu is probably busy anyway, and he feels a little stupid and pathetic just thinking about it but he still starts up skype waiting for the familiar login sound.

 

There is the green symbol next to Hyukkyu “Deft” Kim’s name and Martin hovers over the call button.

 

He hasn’t talked to Hyukkyu in three weeks. Not since the LCS started. They are both busy, they are pros, that doesn’t mean though that Martin hasn’t missed Hyukkyu. He always does, it’s always there, a dull ache in a corner of his heart. The time difference, their tight schedules, it’s just the way things are. It’s hard. But they knew this from the start.

 

It hasn’t been a long time to be honest and yet September 2014, when they first met, it feels like ages ago. They were both so young, so naïve, it feels unreal looking back. Martin was the youngest in Fnatic back then, the kid, so to say. They all had been his big brothers in a way. And then everything changed, sOAZ, xpeke, cyanide, they all left and so did Martin. But he came back, back to a new Fnatic, a younger Fnatic. They were equals then, friends playing a video game for a living under Yellowstar’s guidance.

 

Now it’s 2016 and Martin isn’t the kid anymore. He’s the captain. _H_ e is the leader. It’s nothing he ever wanted but somebody had to step up, somebody had to, so Martin did.

 

His throat feels dry and he runs his fingers through his blonde messy hair once more before finally clicking the call button. It rings once, twice, five times and Martin is ready to hang up and give sleep another shot but that’s when suddenly the “call-accepted”-sound rings through the room and Martin’s heart skips a beat when Hyukkyu ‘s face appears on his desktop. There is a shy smile on the korean’s face as he gives a tiny wave as a greeting.

 

“Hey.” Martin says softly. It’s so good to see Hyukkyu’s face again, even if it’s only through a webcam. The sun is already up in Shanghai, it falls on Hykkyus auburn hair, it’s so beautiful. Martin doesn’t dare to think about how _he_ himself is looking, the minimal lighting in his room and the low quality webcam probably aren’t helping. He knows there are deep shadows under his eyes and he’s probably really pale too, especially in this light.

 

He knows he looks worse than he thought, when he sees Hyukkyu’s smile fall and being replaced by an expression of worry.

 

“Martin…you good?” Hyukkyu asks carefully .

 

Martin tries his best to smile, seeing Hyukkyu makes it easier but it’s still not convincing judging by the look on the his face so Martin adds a quick “I’m good ,yeah.” Hoping it might do the trick, even though he doesn’t even know why he tries to pretend. This is Hyukkyu after all.

 

“You don’t look good.” Hyukkyu says unsurprisingly. “I mean…you do but…not. I-“ He looks frustrated, english is still tough for him Martin knows, even though it has gotten so much better.

 

“I’m just tired that’s all.” Martin says, wrapping his blanket tighter around himself. It feels so good to hear Hyukkyu’s voice again. Maybe, Martin thinks, if he closed his eyes now, he could pretend Hyukkyu was right there with him and not continents away.

 

“Then why no sleeping, Martin?” Hyukkyu asks, his voice soft, he’s looking at his wrist watch, probably counting back seven hours. “Very late in berlin, no?”

 

Martin just nods, because yes it is late and yes he should be asleep, but he is not. He’s awake at 2am and skyping with a guy who he only met in person a number of times he can count on one hand and the truth is he feels a little like crying.

 

“My head is just…” he makes a vague hand motion but Hyukkyu seems to understand somehow, because he smiles sympathetically, in a way of understanding.

 

They are both silent for a few moments, but it’s a different kind of silence. It’s comforting in a way, but it’s also not at all. It’s frustrating, because Martin is here in Berlin and Hyukkyu is in Shanghai. He is so far away. Most of the time it’s bearable somehow, just the nature of their job, just the way things are, but right now, when Martin feels as vulnerable as he does right now, it’s just frustrating.

 

It’s just another thing on the list, how unfair it is that Martin just had to fall in love with someone who is thousands of miles away. Just his kinda luck.

 

“How is new team?” Hyukkyu asks finally and that stings a little because what is Martin supposed to say? They are good guys, Gamsu, Spirit, Noxiak, they really are. It’s not their fault that Martin feels the way he does. It’s just so much that’s going on, there is that constant weight on Martin’s chest that makes it hard to breathe sometimes, because he _has_ to do good. This is on him, this team. _He_ needs to do now what Yellowstar did last year, rebuild the team, he needs to lead, he needs to make the calls, he needs to prove those people wrong who say Fnatic is done, Fnatic is never going to be as good as it was. Fnatic is broken.

 

He _needs_ to do good. It’s on Martin .

 

And it’s too much. At least that feels what it feels like sometimes, like now, when he’s alone in his bedroom, after a week that went less than ideal.

 

“I…” he’s looking for words to say but nothing comes out so he hides his face behind his hands. He doesn’t want to cry, this is pathetic, he is pathetic. He should never have called Hyukkyu. He’s a pro. He needs to keep his emotions in control.

 

“It’s tough.” He gets out finally, trying to smile but Hyukkyu isn’t having it. He looks at him with those dark eyes, but it’s not pity. It’s understanding.

 

“Oh Martin, I wish…” Hyukkyu bites his lip. Martin knows what he means, He wishes Hyukkyu was here too. Martin remembers how good it had felt to have Hyukkyu hold him in his skinny arms after Fnatic lost in Singapore. He remembers the soft kisses on his neck, the tentative hands, his own heart beating so fast.

 

“…I try.” Martin says eventually. “I try so hard but I- It’s all a bit much you know? I have to be the leader, you know? The captain. I have to- And I- Then I have to, of course, do good ingame. I have to- I want to perform! I want to do good! I want to be…I want to be me. But I…”

 

“You are.” Hyukkyu cuts him off. “Best adc, Martin. You know. Just new. “ he frowns, probably frustrated because of his English “with new support is hard, no?”

 

Martin just nods, running his hands through his hair. Yeah it’s hard. So incredibly hard. He’s played with Yellowstar for so long. Yellowstar who was the very definition of veteran when it came to playing league professionally. And now _he_ is supposed to be the veteran. He is supposed to take on this weight on shoulders. It’s a lot of pressure. But if someone gets it. It might be Hyukkyu.

 

“He plays so different from me, you know?” Martin says quietly. It’s difficult to explain, but Hyukkyu is an adc too, he knows how important synergy on botlane is. He knows how frustrating it is when it’s not there.

 

“Not there yet.” Hyukkyu gives him a small smile “Takes time. Getting…you know…” he gestures with his hands “…right with each other. Playing together. But Martin can do it, yes? He can, I know it.”

 

Martin hates it, the way his voice trembles when he finally whispers “…what if I can’t?” He lets out a shaky breath, it feels like betrayal to say those words. He’s not allowed to feel this way. He doesn’t want to. He has to be optimistic he has to believe in himself and his team. He _knows_ that.

 

But it’s so hard. So unbelievably hard sometimes.

 

“Oh Martin…” There is pain in Hyukku’s voice and Marty is angry at himself because he put it there, because _he_ can’t keep it together. The tears still come even though he tries his best to hold them back but he’s just so tired.

 

“Look Martin, look,” Hyukkyu says, but Martin can’t he hides his face behind his knees. “Look first game. You against Origen, yeah? You were good, so good, Martin. So proud”

 

Hyukkyu smiles and Martin shakes his head “You watched that? But you don’t watch other team’s games.”

 

It’s true Hyukkyu rarely does, he doesn’t have the time. It’s not because he thinks he’s so good he doesn’t need to watch other players, he’s just so busy with practice all the time.

 

“But Martin plays, I watch. I try” Hyukkyu smiles and it warms Martin’s heart a little before he suddenly feels cold.

 

“Oh god.” He groans. “So you saw last week against G2 too? They destroyed us.”

 

Hyukkyu just nods. What is he supposed to say? There is nothing nice to say about that game. Martin had felt like such a disappointment to the team, the fans, himself.

 

“Bad games…Happens. I know. Everyone know.” Hyukkyu tries, he briefly turns around, probably checking if some of his teammates are up. It’s not against any rules, for them to be skyping. It could raise questions though. They need to be careful, Martin knows that, but Hyukkyu turns around again, looks like they got a little more time, maybe a ten minutes, maybe more, maybe less.

 

“But Roc…Roccat, right? Against them. Game was bad too, I saw but, you won, Fnatic won, yeah?” Hyukkyu says, ruffling his hair with one hand.

 

Martin nods. The game was a mess, an absolute fucking mess and by all means they should have lost. How they managed to turn it around was still kind of a mystery to him. “Still don’t know how we won that….” He mumbles, not even sure if Hyukkyu heard.

 

“You, Martin.” Hyukkyu says. “You won because you. You, kept…not even, no…better you better farm, than them, even though they killed you so often, you still better than them, yeah? So brave. So calm. Not given up. You won game. You did it.” Hyukkyu is talking faster than usually the English coming out broken and heavily accented but he seems so determined, he wants Martin to get this, to understand.

 

“I had to, you know? It was a bad situation I just…tried. I don’tknow.” Martin rubs his eyes, letting out a heavy breath. There is nothing to say about it. The game was shit but he somehow managed to make the best of it. Not pretty but it worked somehow.

 

“Yes, Martin tried. You tried and it worked, no? You can do it. Bad situation but Martin is good, Martin tries. Getting win for team.”

 

Hyukkyu looks so sincere it makes a tiny smile creep on Martin’s face. He breathes in, breathes out.

 

“So…” he tries, his voice a little hoarse. “Hyukkyu watching my games, huh? Making me blush a little.”

 

Hyukkyu silently laughs at that and shakes his head. “Silly, Martin. You make me blushing. You, life of legends, I watched episodes and Martin wearing that….” he gestures with his hands “… black pants with, here, knees ripped. So nice Martin. So nice.”

 

Martin laughs at that, he is glad Hyukkyu is letting him change the subject, something lighter, not so heavy.

 

“You watch those? Hyukkyu, it’s about the team, not my pants, pay attention!” he pretends to scowl but Hyukkyu just giggles, hiding his laugh behind his hand, it’s so cute. Martin misses him so much.

 

“But English so hard! So fast!” Hyukkyu argues, still laughing a little “easier just looking at pretty Martin.“

 

“I’m not pretty, you are.” Martin says sticking out his tongue at Hyukkyu, who is indeed blushing. Before Martin can say anything else though Hyukkyu turns around, there are some voices in the background , he can’t make out words, but it doesn’t matter. It’s Chinese or Korean anyway. Hyukkyu turns back to him an apologetic look on his face. “Have to goodbye now Martin.”

 

“Yeah no, it’s fine.” Martin says quickly. “I gotta go to sleep anyway, right?”

 

Hyukkyu fidgets with the sleeve of his jacket quietly then he says “Martin, no be sad, yes? Be you, yes? You are good. It’s hard. I know. You try that’s brave. That…counts.”

 

“Thank you, Hyukkyu.” Martin says after a moment. It’s weird but he feels a little bit better and isn’t that strange, that few words with the right person can make everything better even though that person is on the other side of the world.

 

“How you say my name,” Hyukkyu laughs softly “so cute accent. Sounds so funny.”

 

“Eeey,” Martin smiles fondly “…I miss you too.”

 

The screen goes black then and Martin sighs pushing his laptop shut. He doesn’t dare too look at the clock. It’s way too late. He should have been asleep hours ago. He hopes the others won’t be able to tell tomorrow morning during practice. But then again right now it feels like tomorrow he might actually feel more rested than the last few weeks despite the lacking hours of sleep.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own any person(s) or brand(s) mentioned in this piece. This is a work of fiction and is meant to be read as such.
> 
> I have of course no idea if Rekkles feels this way or how things are in the fnatic gaming house. i made this all up. it's just a scene i had in mind so i wrote it. Enjoy. Or don't. Just don't be mean :)


End file.
